sabbatical

Ben and I are currently finishing the 3rd week of a 9 week sabbatical from Young Life. Back in September, in the middle of great loss (piled on several other events/losses the last several years) it was planned for us to take some time off - from right after Fall Weekend (the week of Thanksgiving) through the end of January. It seemed so far away - 2 whole months. Those two months were filled with so much - a lot of it was good and fun and bright moments - but it was still so much. There were clubs, leaderships, committee meetings, training new staff, banquets, a trip to Texas, administrating Fall Weekend (me), taking our area on Fall Weekend (Ben), counseling, weddings, baseball games, basketball practices, gymnastics, piano lessons, parking lots duties, birthdays, family road trips, work at the church, laundry, groceries, feeding the people who live in this house . . . life.

There was zero margin. No breathing room. There was so much anxiety. So much grief. It sucked to get up every day and try to meet the needs of so much and many around us. I tried so much to be a buffer for Ben. For about a month after Paul died, everything was so fuzzy. And sad. And hard. And then it got so fast on top of that with banquets and Ben traveling and Fall Weekend and year end stuff and trying to prepare to be gone for 9 weeks.

Life was 100% overwhelming.

Then it all stopped. And we breathed. And we slept. Our phones went quiet. Our email inboxes remain (mostly) empty. There is space. There is margin. There is room to take a huge breath. And a nap. There is freedom to spend time with each other and time as a family without interruption.

We are sitting around the dining room table almost every night for dinner. We are doing a family advent book. We joined a gym - and going to said gym. We're reading books and watching movies and football. We are reading scripture and praying together. We have several trips planned - as a family and just the two of us. We are going to paint the living room and the kitchen (after the Christmas tree comes down). We are taking the kids on dates and going on dates ourselves. Ben is attending any sporting event he is offered a ticket. We are learning about rest, solitude and sabbath - things we have pridefully neglected. We are learning and praying and planning about how to re-enter ministry differently than we left.

I am loving every second of this. Ben is learning to appreciate it. It has definitely been hard for him. But necessary. We are grateful for the opportunity.